he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Terrible idea I love it
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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