But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
