are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
