I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
