dude i'm inner monologue high
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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