see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
It was confusing and full of hummus
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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