he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
