All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
