the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
