i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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