I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Randomize
