I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
