I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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