It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
