Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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