I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
