She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
