woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
