She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize