I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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