twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
