I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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