Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
oh god was she eating orange peels again
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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