She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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