i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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