good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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