I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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