he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
