Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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