3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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