when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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