a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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