Ambien. No doubt about it.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
