How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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