i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize