I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
