that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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