just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize