i just google imaged poop.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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