we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
