Those balls look pretty dangerous.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
