We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
