Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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