Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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