just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
im on a boat
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