im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
