i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
