Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Randomize
