we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
