hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
