You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
